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[OM] Does it have a zoom?

Subject: [OM] Does it have a zoom?
From: "Lama-Jim L'Hommedieu" <lamadoo@xxxxxxxx>
Date: Tue, 23 Dec 2003 21:51:54 -0500
A woman at work was talking about Christmas and cameras.  She said that between 
her mom, her sister, and herself, they had only one
camera.  She had loaned her camera to her sister and didn't expect it back 
before Christmas.

I went home and got the Stylus Epic QD that I bought to resell and gave it to 
her.  I said, "Here's the camera, a fresh battery,
film, the box, the strap, and the instructions.  It's even splash-proof."

She said, "It's so tiny!  Does it have a zoom?"

"Well, no.  But Sharon, the thing about zooms is..."

Her phone rang and took the call.  Right in the middle of her phone 
conversation, she turned to me and went, "How do I open it?"  I
showed her but she lost interest in the camera, turned her back towards me, and 
talked to her sister.  I stood patiently for awhile
but another call came in and she took that one too!  End of discussion.  So I 
shrugged and went back to my office.

She came upstairs later to return the Stylus Epic QD.   Her words were very 
telling.  She said, "I think it's sweet that you went
and got this for me but... here.  I'm going to buy something with a zoom....  
Because... <pregnant pause> I just want a zoom."

Riiight.  I never got to the selling point of loading the Stylus with 800.  I 
never got to explain that the Stylus is small but it
lets in EIGHT TIMES AS MUCH LIGHT as an f8 zoom.  I never got to say that she 
can have 10 years of snapshots without a single flash
exposure if she chooses her camera wisely.  No red eye for 10 years worth of 
snapshots!

She has it in her head that she needs a zoom so she can hold her head up when 
she shows it off.  All the other Moms have zooms, I'm
sure and I'm sure the stink of being a hand-me-down didn't help.

Joni Mitchell said, "*HIP* is a herd mentality."

BTW, Sharon drives herself and her two children in a mini-van.  She's "herd 
mentality" the whole way.  She'll probably get a digital
with an underpowered flash (3/4" away from the lens), and a compromised f11 
zoom.  She'll be happy though, because her pictures will
look JUST LIKE all the other redeye-infested ones taken by the other soccer 
moms.  When her hard drive dies, she can moan about how
she should have taken better care of her children's memories.  She'll have lots 
of company.

I hate my life,
Jim

PS, My apologies to you, my friends.  Because I didn't have the "last word" 
with her, I had to have it here.


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