Oh, the English language!
> > Subject: If . . .
> >
> >
> > > If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times,
> > > does he become disoriented?
> > >
> > > If people from Poland are called Poles, why aren*t people from
> > > Holland called Holes?
> > >
> > > If you mixed vodka with orange juice and milk of magnesia, would
> > > you get a Philip*s screwdriver?
> > >
> > > If a pig loses it*s voice, is it disgruntled?
> > >
> > > If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular?
> > >
> > > When someone asks you, *A penny for your thoughts* and you put
> > > your two cents in, what happens to the other penny?
> > >
> > > Why is the man who invest all your money called a broker?
> > >
> > > Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It*s just stale
bread
> > > to begin with.
> > >
> > > When cheese gets its picture taken, what does it say?
> > >
> > > Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist, but a
person
> > > who drives a race car not called a racist?
> > >
> > > Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposite things?
> > >
> > > If horrific mean to make horrible, doesn*t terrific mean to make
> > > terrible?
> > >
> > > Why isn*t 11 pronounced onety-one?
> > >
> > > *I am.* is reportedly the shortest sentence in the English
> > > language.
> > > Could it be that *I do.* is the longest sentence?
> > >
> > > If lawyers are disbarred and clergymen are defrocked, doesn*t it
> > > follow that electricians can be delighted, musicians denoted,
> > > cowboys
> > > deranged, models deposed, tree surgeons debarked and dry
cleaners
> > > depressed?
> > >
> > > Do Roman paramedics refer to IV*s as 4*s?
> > >
> > > Why is it that if someone tells you that there are 1 billion
stars
> > > in the universe you will believe them, but if they tell you a
wall
> > > has wet paint, you will have to touch it to be sure?
> > >
> >
> >
> >
>
>
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